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12 November 2019 - 22:46


We're here at work, just kinda killing time before it's time for us to go pick Mom up from work. Don't really feel like going home first, though we probably should, at least to feed our dogs. Poor things must be cold.

So Angel finally started opening up a bit to us again about his inner peeps. He told us he feels this is a permanent thing, and that it feels legit. I want to make absolutely sure this is something that comes from him, and not something that we are influencing. And I'm still holding out on the fact that he could eventually change his mind. Y'know, decide it was just a confusing part of his puberty. Either way, I told him (them) I'd be there for him/them no matter what. He does seem way more chill about the whole thing now. Anelí mentioned to me that his group has now blossomed into a 13-member system, to which he quickly corrected: "fourteen." Then, just a few days later, he sent me several texts with chibi images of his members that he'd made with an app, and listed their names. Now, there are a total of sixteen!

Wow. It's a tad overwhelming. We didn't crop up at nearly that rate, at least, I don't remember, and I'm worried that many of these inner voices are in reality just characters that he's making up, for stories and the like, and that he may be confusing them for actual people. I just theorize this because he mentioned making stories up and writing them down, and that many of these "characters" actually live in these stories. So, not the same thing as a multiple system, if you follow.

XVL: Jeez, give the kid a break, Grizz. You can't see or judge what's going on in that mind. All we can do is offer support.

GRIZZLY: I know that! It's why I haven't voiced these doubts to Angel, nor will I. It's just... I know what that's like, sorta. In the sense that I, too, have an inner fantasy world where I create stories, and while I'm there, the characters in them: Xenith, Artemis, Laura, Alenok, the Cravens, the Wakahisa twins, etc., seem very real to me. I can see them as clearly as I see any of you guys, in our mind. Except that these guys aren't real. Not in the sense any of us are. They can't "cross over" to our mindspace, so to speak. They can't take over the body and frontrun; hell, they can't even talk to any of us, and only go through the motions of their daily lives that then in turn make up the stories I tell. In fact, even though they can't see me, they can act through me. Almost like I'm a medium, or I turn the body into one and they can feel very... present. But I control their narrative; I decide their fate. I can change it, too, and as their stories develop, often times I tweak their personalities and even their appearances, thanks in large part to you, Sal. I'm old enough, and mature enough, I hope, to understand that there is a real difference between all these characters (and they are many) and the rest of us system members. I'm just concerned that Angel, or at least one of the members of his inner family, has this, as well, but doesn't know how to tell the difference just yet.

XVL: Or it could be that he just has a butt-load of members and became aware of them/developed them, I don't know, in a very short amount of time.

GRIZZLY: Could be. Anyhow, we need to log off this thing already. It's time for us to go pick up Mom. We'll talk this over later.

XVL: Hey, at least they're talking to us now. Isn't that what we wanted? Now we'll get to know our nephew better.

GRIZZLY: Yeah. You're right.

XVL: Always am!

GRIZZLY: *rolls eyes* No, that's Piojo. But let's not involve him in this conversation just now.

XVL: What? *laughs* Dude, it's not like saying his name makes him appear. He's not Beetlejuice!

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