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05 May 2004 - 18:02


*Moco, Ninja & Yang sit on the bed in the Closet*


*the sudden burst from el maniaco mexicano sends Yang jumping up and falling to the floor on his ass and Ninja screaming in surprise*


*Moco laughs*

NINJA (angrilly): Dawg! What the hell's the matter wit' ya?!

YANG: Holy shit, man, you almost gave me a heart attack!

NINJA: An' I almost shit my pants!

MOCO: Guey! Don't you two know que d�a es hoy?

YANG: Uh... Wednesday?

MOCO: �No seas pendejo, cabr�n! �Hoy es el Cinco de Mayo!

NINJA (still grouching): So what? Mom's birthday ain't for ten more days. An' Mother's Day ain't today either.

MOCO (scowling): Que desgracia, de veras. �Como te profesas ser mexicano si ni siquira te sabes los dias historicos de la patria?

YANG: Oh... that cinco de mayo.

*Piojo shuffles into the Closet, wrapped in what appears to be the mexican flag*

NINJA: Yo dawg! And who's you supposed ta be dressed as?

PIOJO: Well, I ain't no Ni�o Heroe.

*Moco laughs, but Ninja just stars blankly at our protector*

PIOJO: *sigh* I'm being patriotic, dipshit.


MOCO: En serio, you two are really sacados de onda today. �Donde han estado todo el d�a - smoking weed out back or something?

NINJA: No! It's just that there ain't been anything on the TV that said what today wuz.

MOCO: Guey - we've been listening to Chente Fernandez todo el pinche d�a! What? It didn't hit you then?

YANG: No... I wasn't paying attention.

PIOJO: They said it on the fuckin' radio when we went to pay the cell phone bill.

NINJA: But I's wasn't drivin' then! SVL was.

PIOJO: You're pathetic.

MOCO: En serio. Que poco madre la de ustedes.

YANG: Hey!

*Polla walks into the Closet just then with Jack, SVL and Gis. All are dressed to some extent in the colors of the mexican flag. Polla wears her hair in two long braids with green and red ribbons, SVL wears a t-shirt with la Virgen de Guadalupe on the back, Gis trae un sombrero very similar to Moco's, only smaller to fit her little head, and Jack keeps alternating colors between el verde, blanco y rojo.*

POLLA: �Feliz Cinco de Mayo! *she walks over to Yang and kisses him on the cheek and then shows him a tiny mexican flag that has been painted on the left side of her face* SVLI painted our faces! Grizzly's got this awesome eagle on a cactus across his entire face! You guys should let him paint your faces too! You have to be still for a little bit, but it's worth it in the end!

NINJA: A'ight, now I feel like a moron - the ditz knew about the day 'n' we didn't? That shit's just wack!

POLLA: Who are you calling a ditz, you idiot? And what do you mean, you didn't know? *looks from Ninja to Yang* You guys forgot today was el Cinco de Mayo?

YANG: I... uh... I slept late.

NINJA: Yeah, dat.

SVL (laughing): You guys are such idiots!

NINJA: Aw, lay off!

*BB pokes her face into the Closet, the Aztec calender painted on each cheek, like chapitas*

MOCO: Hey, linda! Looking nice!

BB: Thanks. I just came to get you guys. We've gotta go take that psychology test already! After that, we can go to mom's work and eat chalupas! Y'all coming?

SVL: Yeah, hold on.

POLLA (to Yang & Ninja): Come on, you two, SVL can paint your faces when we're done!

*Moco Gish scoops up Gis and all proceed to walk out of the Closet, the two thugs still a bit shy and embarassed after the whole ordeal*

MOCO (calling out to BB): Hey, linda! �Adivina que se les olvido a estos dos gueyes?

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