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26 January 2006 - 02:54

searing the Black


They don't understand. I can never be like them, like Ninja and Polla. They're just so.... extroverted. Is that even a word? (*Grizzly shruggs*) Ah, I don't know...! I wish I weren't so mistrustful all the time. I'm too quiet for my own good, too much of a loner. I suspect outsiders easily. That's what Piojo likes about me, if he's capable of liking anything I guess. He approves of it, nonetheless. But none of the others do, and I understand why. I bring them down too much, way too much. I don't know what to do to make it better, easier on them. I can't change the way I am. Well, granted, I could, but I don't want to. So I won't then. But it makes the rest of us "me's" miserable! Even Jack and the Little One seem to shrivel a bit when I grow stoic and shun those around me. Especially him. And yeah, I am jealous. It's just not fair! I mean, they knew me before the kid ever walked into our life; why does he get all the attention?! He's an outisder for chrissakes! And he's coming to take a strong sway over the others and it's just not fair! I know I sound like a whining bitch, Moco, so shut the fuck up. I don't care at this point. You don't have to deal with him, he's not your friend. Wait until they try to make him part of the family, see how you like it, you fucker!

*sigh* I need to go do my German now.

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